Shit That I Have Realized

So I've noticed lately that there is a trend in the porn industry, I know this because our black box allows us to get 4 channels of porno, that a lot of the girls are lesbians. Now if I could meet a chick like the ones that I see, I think I wouldn't know what to do with my self. What ever hopped to the hard penis being inserted into the vagina. I know that these dikes are cool and what not, but in the real world they don't really exist because the dikes are old fat nasty bitches that wouldn't even get a scum bag of a man, so the turn to fellow women who have the same problem, or they are women who were married how gotta divorce and now hate all men except priests. I won't say I'm going to boycott porn, like the blacks did the bus, but I am upset when I turn on the tube and see two chicks eating each other out, because I realize that I never Happens.

Another thing, Massachusetts Blows. To start, you can't go to your local convenient store and pick up a 6-pack of your favorite fermented beverage. You have to go to a package store and deal with those shucks. And in Boston, they are usually non-English speaking fuckers. Also, all of the bars close at 2. In the biggest college town in the country, the bars close at 2 in the fucking morning. How gay is this. If I were a bar owner I would lobby the Massachusetts State government and get them to change this ubber-gay law because they will make up the money in underage drinkers how will most definitely say till close while still chasing that last lonely girl at the bar.

So the other day I was doing my laundry here at school, and this chick comes down with a huge load of clothes and a large bottle of detergent. So I said to myself "self, its going to suck to be her, when she has to take all of those clothes back upstairs because all of the washers are full." Next thing I see is this stupid hoe loading her dry clothes into the dryer. Instead of telling her that it was a dryer, I decided to see how far this shit is going to last. She loads all of her clothes in.... This is the point where I left because I couldn't with hold my urge to slap the bitch for being to stupid. But when I came down 38 minutes later, to switch my shit over to the dryer, her clothes were spinning in the dryer. What made it worse was that she was extremely hott!!! But as I have realized, the hotter they are the more common sense they lack.

Here is a short list of the things I could live without:
1. Pop ups - how the fuck is going to click on a link that whey are the 34556603687 visitor to a site that they never heard of, after it interrupts whatever they were doing. If you answer "I would" go kill yourself because they are only there to piss people off and have no actual purpose in life. How ever thought of this idea was a genius because he has found something that pissed everyone off and the god thing about them is that they don't know when they are going to strike. This man is my hero, I wish I would piss people off like that.
2. The bell in Elevators - If you need to be reminded when the boor in front of you is about to open, they you are a fucking retard and should be the next Jessica Simpson. They have no purpose except to piss you off when you have to go to the 15th floor and hear that fucking "ding" on every floor. This is when I pray for the elevator cables to snap and fall to my death, because that would first off be cool to die in an elevator accident and to you would never have to hear that fucking noise again.
3. Vegetarians - All these people to is piss me off, especially after working in a restaurant for 5 years. I hope the die in an accident where they are eaten by a cow, a lamb, and a pig. The worst are the vegans who don't eat any animal products at all. I would not be able to survive more then 13 hours with out something soaked in animal fat. I always got a kick when some rich fuckers order some Vegan pancakes and we grease the grittle with the back fat of a pig.
4. Cock Teases - Who doesn't hate a bitch who is all over you at a party and then she's like "Bye Bye." What make it worse is when they were clothes that leave nothing to the imagination and does a cartwheel wearing a skirt and a thong. If this isn't asking for a huge penis, then I guess I must be a gay cheerleader that like penis and wears a pink shirt, this just happens to be a description of a dude at the party the other night, because all the the sluts I know would do a lot less to get a giant meat sausage for the night. I hope these types of girls turn out to be the nasty dikes I mentioned before, because no straight man wants to be around a slut like this.

That it for now, and remember no fat chick is safe to fuck, ever!!